It’s been a few weeks since we last crossed paths. I think maybe I was avoiding you. I don’t want to say I missed you. That would mean I’m getting dependent and that’s the last thing I need.
In any case, you’re here again now, back in my life as if you never left in the first place. Your voice is hissing in my ears like static buzz. It’s making me dizzy like I’m watching the test pattern on the tv at 4am. You’ve turned me upside down again like you always do. I can already tell that any vague ideas I had about plans for the day have gone out the window. When you’re around I can’t think straight. I’m just gonna sit here awhile and try to stop the edges of my world from spinning.
You’re giving me a headache. I’m not stressed out, but I can’t relax properly when you’re around. I want to just lie and listen to music, but I can’t concentrate with you there. There’s a sour taste in my mouth because of you. The people in my room aren’t too happy about you either. You’re too disruptive.
But I can’t stay mad at you. I know we’re going to keep doing this to each other. Always coming and going. You’re never fully here but never quite gone. I’m glad when you’re not around, but I still think about you.
Maybe it won’t last forever. Maybe it will. In the meantime there’s nothing for it but to welcome you back into my life, old friend.